The funeral should take place as soon as possible after death occurs.
The casket should remain closed at all times. The living should be helped to remember the departed as they were in life, not with the image of death.
Jewish tradition dictates the use of wooden caskets, demonstrating that simplicity is an ideal which teaches the equality of all Jews.
The rending of the mourner's outer garment (K'riyah) is a symbol of inner anguish and grief.
Shivah is the observance of a seven day mourning period from the day of burial. This experience provides deep emotional and psychological benefit. Shivah is observed by children, siblings, spouse and parents.
It is considered a mitzvah (good deed) for visitors to be with mourners during the Shivah period. Their role is to console the mourners and to enable them to express their sense of loss. Stories and reflections about the deceased are most helpful.
One of the most common Jewish cemetery customs is to leave a small stone at the grave of a loved one after saying Kaddish or visiting. Its origins are rooted in ancient times and throughout the centuries the tradition of leaving a visitation stone has become part of the act of remembrance.
The origin of this custom began long ago, when the deceased was not placed in a casket, but rather the body was prepared, washed, and wrapped in a burial shroud, or for a male, in his tallit (prayer shawl). Then the body would be placed in the ground, covered with dirt and then large stones would be placed atop the gravesite, preventing wild animals from digging up the remains. Over time, individuals would go back to the gravesite and continue to place stones, ensuring the security of the site and as a way to build up the "memory" of the loved one.
As time passed on, and carved monuments became the preferred memorial, the custom of leaving a visitation stone became a symbolic gesture-a way for the visitor to say to the loved one, "I remember you..."